Tag Archives: police

a shooting in colorado

it’s late thursday night/early friday morning.   it’s another big budget comic book movie opening.  the movie screens just after midnight to squeeze all the juice and hype out of it that can be had.  the smaller theatre is packed.  there’s a certain type of movie-goer who wants to be first to see the new ‘thing’, whatever it is.  they almost always turn out in droves.   the highly anticipated movie is playing and the crowd is lost in their cinematic experience.

in the darkness, from the front of the theater, a rolling and hissing sound occurs.  then a shot into the air.  then shots into the audience.  it’s mayhem.  many are dead and dozens more are wounded.

it’s a stupid tragedy.   a nut with a gun.

each time this happens the reaction is predictably banal.   one part of society wants to blame the gun.   another wants to blame the media the shooter might have consumed – film, tv, pornography, whatever.  certain factions of the media will look into the person’s background to try to find some deeper, more nuanced culprit.  they are all big on blame.  they want to point a finger like the gun itself was pointed.  i don’t know what the point of that could be.

why would someone kill and hurt so many people randomly?   people ask the question like there is an answer that would satisfy.

the theories abound:  was he acting out a movie or something, playing out some script he had made in his head?  the media and the public react almost like they are going off of their own script.  they run with stories of: what precautions are being taken to ensure this doesn’t happen here?  are local moviegoers staying home instead of going to the movies because of the tragedy?  was the killer influenced my movies and comic books (we’ll tell you what your kids might be reading at 11!)?  were his parents intolerably cruel to him?  was his bullied?  did he ever get laid?  why did he dye his hair?  what kind of car did he drive?  and on and on.

they report it as though there is some combination of media, trauma and personality disorder than can drive someone to kill random people in the biggest possible number.

after 9/11, we settled in for a long campaign of security bullshit in the name of freedom.  and though airport security has proven itself in this country to be ineffective, we still put our toiletries in bags, take off our shoes, and surrender our liberty temporarily to people at the airport who want to look at infra-red pictures of our naked bodes, just before they run the back of their hand over a woman’s tits or a guys crotch.

in the wake of this awful event, many people will call for increased security at movie theaters,  like this is likely to happen again and again.

we live in a fear based and safety obsessed culture.  whenever anything happens that is negative, an effort is made to stop that bad thing from ever happening again.  it starts small – bicycle helmets and metal detectors.  but taken to the extreme, our hunger for surety and safety leads us slowly to less freedom and a kind of paralysis.

we also live in an increasingly narcissistic, individual-driven culture where the self is all and everyone’s point of view has to be catered to.   the shooter in this case is no different.  when i was young and feeling lost and miserable, it never occured to me to kill anyone else.  it was always a suicidal instinct.  in the wake of shootings like this, i wonder if the self-centered culture we’ve crafted makes this a last resort.  the postmodern suicide is inverted, and you therefore try to kill everyone else.

the shooter in this case was james holmes.

some reports have him acting out a ‘joker’ persona as he’s been in custody.  is this surprising or satisfactory?   of course he’s playing a role.  he’s playing the role of a mad killer, because he is one.   he’s imitating the worst of crazy behavior, maybe because he’s nuts and maybe because he thinks that’s what a mad killer is supposed to do.  i’m sure he’s played out even the scenario he’s in now a 1000 times.  i wonder if it’s going like he hoped?

here’s a gallery of his pics:

 

a lot is being made in the media that they can’t find his twitter or facebook accounts, as though his being on social media is a given.  he probably deleted or deactivated any accounts, for whatever reason, before the violence.  but maybe not.  curiously, his adult friend finder account was created just this month and wasn’t deleted.  he looks like a total goof.  maybe this was intentional.

not being able to find his social networking stuff, the experts started to weight in on what this could mean:

“it’s certainly unusual. data suggests that 95 to 98 percent of people holmes’ age are on social media,” dr. megan moreno, of university of wisconsin-madison school of medicine and public health, told CBS News.  as for that other 5-to-2 percent, moreno, highlighted a link between extreme internet use – or lack of use – and depression.

do you see what the ‘expert’ said there?  if you use too much internet (and i guess social networking), you are likely to be depressed.  but also, if you use too little, you might also be depressed?

the assumptions here are ridiculous.  first, that he didn’t just deactivate or delete his stuff before he wanted to go apeshit is something you don’t know.  second, that if you are a human being, you must, in some way use social networking.  third, that your main use of the internet is likely social networking.  and fourth, that some degree of social networking is necessary to be mentally healthy?  meh…. i dunno.

my point is – stories like this are a problem.  they dissect meaning and motive on a molecular level looking for those aforementioned ‘answers’ which do not exist.  in helping people to deal with the grief and sadness, they endorse precautions which aren’t necessary and only serve to reinforce that fear, that grief.

perhaps the coverage of these shootings makes future shootings more likely to happen.  the angry loner who might otherwise just be a passive aggressive dick in life or hurt himself can make the leap from turning his self loathing outward rather than inward.  slowly, the fantasy of doing something awful and achieving infamy feeds his ego and helps him forget how crazy he must actually be, or how much he truly hates himself or life itself.

the media has made a big deal about how he dropped out of medical school, that he may have been living off a national institutes of health university grant, that he booby trapped his apartment, that his hair was dyed a comical color and that he ‘planned’ the mass murder.

whereas the story of the victims and their lives give our grief a name and a measure of the true humanity of the situation, the details they feed us about the killer give us some measure of control, some degree of safety.  we can look at him and say, like i said in the sierra newbold blogs, that he is not us.  it isn’t us that did this awful thing.  we can feel comfort in the fact that we are nothing like him.  and though i do think there’s some measure of an outward, destructive impulse inside us all, of course we aren’t like him.

of course this is an aberration – that’s why we are talking about it so much.  if the movie went off without a hitch, save for the fact that a kid tripped on the stairs in the dark, we wouldn’t mention that if we were in the theater itself, because that happens a million times a day.

that this is so appalling, that we feel the need to pointlessly dissect every aspect of it is proof that this is not the norm.  it is not a trend.  it’s just an awful thing that happened because of one asshole.   the curious part is that he gave himself up and is still alive to be ogled like a diseased zoo animal.

i’ve visited the denver and specifically the aurora, colorado area a lot.  denver is one of my favorite cities.  some pics from the area can be found here, but given my photographic inclination, they are probably largely just of random people.    it’s the only connection i can find to the area to share, and i can’t find the ones i liked the most that i took earlier….but there’s the link anyways.

the shooter had his first court appearance today.  i wonder if he was drugged, or if he’s trying to appear out of it.  maybe he is just downright mentally ill.  he bobbed his head and blinked a lot, like a moronic champion.  i took a screenshot on my phone and made him into a painting, since he appears so clown-like.

james holmes at his first court appearance, if claude monet was the courtroom sketch artist

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lost sierra

there’s this little girl, pictured above, who disappeared from her home a few mornings ago.  sadly, her body was found very close to the home that same morning.  her name was sierra newbold.

it’s a rare and sad story.  there was ‘evidence of sexual abuse’.   she is gone.

this story is like some others you might know about, but this one is especially disturbing to me, and gnawing at me, because the little girl lived, and her body was discovered, maybe 100 yards from my house.

the day she was killed i woke up at 10 am or so.  it was the morning after i ran the camera on my friend’s awkward hour podcast, where he interviewed chalk artists and quasi-sideshow freak hippie girls.

we had to drive them home and so we were up quite late.

i woke up that morning and edited photos and worked on some writing stuff.  i didn’t leave the house until about 3 pm that day.

as was usual, i was walking out to my little truck with a lot of crap.  i had a shopping bag with my work clothes for my night job, a camera bag which contained my dslr and my zoom sound recorder.  i also had my skateboard, skate shoes and my tripod, which i had removed the night before because of cramming all these people in my truck to drive them all home.

as soon as i was in my driveway i saw several police cars in a row on the street adjacent to mine.  i thought there must be a tremendous automobile crash and dropped everything but my camera bag, because i have a strange fascination with car crashes.  this is probably due to the fact that i have to drive a great deal more than the average person, and some part of me really does think i’ll meet my final and accidental end out there on the road some day.  perhaps it’s my way of dealing with that queer, likely possibility.

but as i got to the corner, not 100 feet away, i saw that it was no car wreck.  there was no wreckage, no ambulances and no sirens.

i saw the driveway that goes through a wooded lot to a canal.  i saw police cars, both marked and unmarked, parked all the way down that drive.  and near the end of the drive, which i could hit with a rock from my front door, i saw gazebos set up.

i know what police and gazebos usually mean.  it usually means a complicated crime scene and often, a body.

i remembered back when the salt lake city police were searching for the body of lori hacking, who had been shot in her sleep by her husband.  he disposed of her body and the mattress that she had been laying on in various dumpsters and only after long weeks of searching did they find her in the landfill

i have to go to the landfill a lot in my daytime work.   i was there with my dump trailer dumping some construction debris when i got word.  the police in the gazebos off in the distance had made a discovery.    they were strangely quiet over there, where they had been active for a couple weeks before.  one of the landfill guys told me to watch the news that night.

maybe this is where my loathing of anything involving gazebos came from.  as it is, i loathe festivals and events that are essentially collections of gazebos where people linger or spend money.

anyways – tuesday afternoon, upon seeing the gazebos, i knew something bad was happening.

i quickly found out on twitter what the deal was.

a little girl’s body had been found.   the other details came a day or so later.

immediately i was oddly comforted by the idea that she was probably killed by someone close to her.  she disappeared early in the morning – like 7 am, and was found a half an hour later not 100 feet from her home.

it sounds odd to say but i thought ‘well, she was probably killed by someone close to her and her family, and that’s…. pretty standard.  it’s not as egregious as some anonymous monster, which seems inconceivable.”

it’s now late thursday night, friday morning.     this afternoon, the police finally opened the road where she lived and drove their giant rv, which serves as a mobile crime lab, away.   after i noticed they were all gone, i wandered down that lane.  i looked at the canal where she was found.

it seemed a crummy place to have to die.  a stagnant water canal whose water doesn’t seem to move until it nearly disappears in the winter.  there weren’t even ducks or birds – just still green water and an eery feeling.

i was struck by the fact that, though we live less than 100 yards away, our house has not been visited by any police.

this makes me think that the police already have a focus for their suspicions and that it isn’t a random stranger.  otherwise – i’d have expected them to knock on ours and everyone else’s door around us to ask us who we are, what our history is, and did we see anything that morning.

instead, the police have said little publicly.   no sketches of people of interest have been released, no real precautions anyone should take have been outlined – very little details.

this too leads me to think it’s a family member or someone close to the family.

and i find this strangely comforting when compared to the idea of some random killer of children stalking my neighborhood.  statistics tell us that people are much more likely to be killed by someone they know than by a stranger.  and unfortunately, children are more often killed, either accidentally or on purpose, by someone close to them or even their parents.

time will tell.

the day of the killing the purple ribbons started popping up all around.  on the outskirts of where the police forbade cars and pedestrians,  people left animals and stuffed animals at the feet of signs.

ribbons and stuffed animals.  they don’t help the poor dead girl.  they can’t.  i guess they are for those of us who are left sad and appalled that such things can and will happen, from time to time.   that they can happen on streets that surround us, on terrain that is so familiar, and in a place that seems so stable, unremarkable and frankly, dull, reminds us of the evil that is possible, the sadness that is always at the end of a moment’s violence, the unfortunately frequent darkness of our own hearts and the senseless cruelty that can be visited upon the most sweet and helpless.

the ribbons are our self assurance that isn’t us that did this.  and the idea that she is somehow in a better place makes the unfathomable awfulness of it all and the nature of our tenuous existence palatable.  i think without these cheerful assurances, many people would be ruined.  i myself cannot be assured by them – so maybe i already am ruined.

below is a collection of items at the intersection near the little girl’s house that i took with my iphone today.  i hope they find out and tell us what happened soon, because even though i’ve assured myself it’s some out of hand domestic thing that turned horribly ugly, i find it hard to sleep at night, this close to such a gruesome, awful scenario.

still, i don’t think that knowing ‘what’ happened makes anything any different, or better – just less mysterious.

 

 

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traffic control

click it or ticket.  why?  because they care about you?

i always wondered this same thing about why would the government fluoridate the water.  do they really care about my teeth that much?  why?  are cavities causing unknown problems that i cannot imagine?

do you really think that we have these click it or ticket laws all over this country just because the police want us to be safe?

i’ve always thought it was a well meaning, 21st century approach to solving a problem that isn’t really that big of a deal in the first place. it’s like events that exist to raise ‘awareness’ of breast cancer and the like.  at this point, i think we get it.  women should check their boobies for lumps now and then.  and if you want a smaller likelihood of not dying in a crash, wear a seatbelt.  why do we need a law and penalties for this?   and, as usually with ‘safety-based’ nonsense, the result is that you potentially penalize everyone else.

and the unforeseen consequence is that now police don’t have to work nearly as hard to manufacture probable cause.  they can just say they didn’t see your seat belt and you’re open to search and seizure any time you are in a car on the road.  a lot of people hear this argument and say ‘so?  i’ve got nothing to hide!’.  these people are the most dangerous among us.

i also think that we should remove the ability for cities, municipalities, counties and states to levy fines for minor traffic infractions. assign people community service and limit/revoke driving privileges instead.

the way it is now, it is used as a revenue generator and the subtext of it all is that they think they can screw with us whenever they want. if there were less incentive to screw with everyday people going about their lives, they simply would not do it. we are not minnows, and they are not sharks in a tank.

this is a topic i posted about on facebook a while ago, but it was brought fresh to my mind when i read that in los angeles, california they are again raising parking fines.

a couple of weeks ago, in salt lake city, there was green festival in downtown in an area where they always hold these kind of street festivals which all seem the same:  someone playing music and a bunch of people in gazebo tents selling food and art.  outside along the road where a lot of people parked, i saw the parking enforcement officer going down the line giving tickets.  on saturday in a town whose downtown isn’t really a hub of activity – especially this part of town.

how much money can they make from parking fines in salt lake city?  they drive right hand drive jeeps and trucks they buy special, they pay these people probably a good, union wage with benefits.  i just wonder what the offset is.  how much they profit versus how they seem to harass and stalk the public who are often trying to do things, almost always spending money downtown, which for years has been anemic.

i know in los angeles it’s a cash cow, but here where i live, i don’t see how it can be.

but the point of this thinking is:  this is an example of how people, even those who are against ‘big government’, just lay down and take it.  not just take it, they expect it, in the name of safety or organization or what have you.  in that instance, government is fine and the usurious fines they charge are the cost of keeping order.  meanwhile banks, corporations, real estate developers and the like can cry that there is too much government intervention.  their argument is that they should be left alone to do their good works, but someone going downtown to get their hair done, buy a book, or whatever the hell people are doing downtown, they should have to be on a constant vigil so that they don’t get a chicken shit ticket.  and they better wear their seat belt on their way.

everything just seems backwards to me.

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undies in a bunch – aftermath

i did a previous post based on my interaction with this events organizer on facebook.  at first i was amused at the thought of the undie run, then i was kind of put off.  my interaction with the group was based on something i posted on the wall for the event and their response to me, although i didn’t mean to attack the group or the idea.  i was just making a joke, really.

the turn out was better than i thought it would be.  i think there was some doubt among the organizers for a bit.  or at least for a bunch of the hookah waitresses who were ‘working’ the event.  i was up in the vip area early on and i heard two of them next to me expressing doubts about turnout because early on it might have seemed soft.  maybe this was just a random conversation that didn’t reflect the organizer’s opinions, but it’s moot because they did get a good turnout.  good for them.

i think they started the group to try to raise awareness about the fact that the state of utah was on the verge of outlawing the use of hookas in bars.  they actually did come close, but they backed off.  but in the meantime, this thing was scheduled.  tons of people rsvp’ed on facebook so they decided to try to go for a guinness book record of people running in their undies.  they got some sponsors.  it became a real event.

the record was only 550.  and it was set recently.  this is mainly because to get certified by guinness you have to do things precisely how they say for verification.  i mean, you gotta have standards.  they had to have at least 1500 people there in total.  i wouldn’t guess it could have been more than 2000, but i could be under.  i haven’t read about crowd estimates yet.  still, you’d have thought the record would be a no-brainer.  but they didn’t organize it well enough and everyone took off at the wrong time.  as it turns out they missed out on the record, this time.  oh well.  i don’t think that was the real point, anyways.

it was interesting to see it all go down.  i vacillated between emotions during the thing.  running in your undies seems like a curious, self serving type of activism.  you make the thing about ‘you’.  and there wasn’t a pure issue being explored.  the run was against utah being ‘uptight’ which sounds funny on facebook but has very little tangible meaning.  at times i thought it was frivolous.  then i thought it was still kinda cool to get that many people to turn out for anything.  then i would think ‘it’s just a semi-nude block party’ and then i thought ‘stuff like this teaches people they can stand up and get a turnout, and maybe that can lead to affecting material change in society’.  and on and on.

now, i take a lot of pictures.  i like taking pictures of random people, especially when they don’t know i’m taking their picture.  i think most people i photograph have absolutely no idea that i ever took their picture.  i don’t want them to know, really.  it’s not necessary.  that being said,  i also don’t often take pictures of people who don’t want me to take their picture, unless they are trying to start a fight with me or flipping me off.  ironically that makes for a better picture than the one i would take if they just remained unawares.  if i look at someone and i sense that they see me and i get this impression they don’t want me to take their picture, i won’t.  you might not believe this based on the volume of pictures i take, but it’s true.

however, at this event i found it hard to take a picture of someone without them trying to quickly ‘pose’ for me.  it was odd.  i had to work to get a candid shot before they pushed out their chest of gave me the thumbs up.  a lot of times i’d take a candid, then the person would see me and pose.  i’d act like i was taking the posed picture and say ‘thank you’.  but i was trying only to take candid shots, not contrived.  it’s just how i like to shoot.  it’s the look of photo i prefer.  i’m not a professional photographer.  i’m not an artist.  i’m just doing my hobby the way i like to.  i’ve taken pictures of people in some of the most interesting places in this country.  on beaches.  in big cities.  in small towns.  i’ve never had so many people try to ‘sit’ for me than at this gathering.

this is why i called it a self serving type of activism.  i think that’s just a reflection of our culture, though, not just these people.  and if this wasn’t activism, it was just a fun way to have a party.

i will be uploading pictures for the next 10-15 days from the undie run on my photoblog.  you should be able to find them here if you are interested.

i did not go to the after party at the gallivan.  i had shot enough photos and believe it or not i had had enough of being around scantily clad people.  i took the train home, having the trax car nearly all to myself.  i thought about the day and the undie run.

the energy of those people made me smile, in the end.  i’m glad i went.  if they start doing it every year i’ll go again.   i hope some real issues can piggyback onto this event in the future.  that’d be even better.

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take the photo and run

so today is saturday.  i had a long day of work.  and i had a little drive at the end of it to get back home.  and one of my favorite pastimes is to stop whenever i see anything even remotely interesting and take pictures of it.  and so i did. on the way i stopped at this graffiti-ed up old farm house.  got some nice shots.  further on the way home, in salt lake city and by the airport, i saw this giant golf ball looking thing.   on a major, 4 lane road.  near a parking lot that is street acessible.

i was driving my full size pickup and pulling a 20 foot trailer.  so what – i see something i want to snap, i burn the calories.  i drive into the parking lot and snap about 10 pictures with my real camera, then these couple with my phone.   i’m in the parking lot less than two minutes.  i am sated.   as i go to get back into my truck, which i left running, here comes the security guard.  fyi, the company is L3 communications and the security guard is a gray haired guy with glasses and of course, his red truck and walkie talkie. now, normally i would have just gotten in my truck and just taken off before he arrived.  but maybe it was the long day, maybe it was me feeling languid, i dunno – but i waited till he rolled up and said ‘sorry i was just taking a couple of pictures, i’m leaving now’.  he totally had the paul blart thing going on – and the first thing he says to me is ‘you just broke the law’.

at this point i turn around and just get in my truck and drive away.  i figure if he’s THAT kind of security guard douchebag, what’s the point in saying anything else?  sadly i was pulling that large trailer so he couldn’t get my tag number – so he followed me.  i left the parking lot and onto the main road and he followed me still.  i saw him coming.  i could have left him behind.  i drive an F350 with a power stroke turbo diesel and despite what you might think, that thing will take off and take off quick – 20 foot trailer or not.  and he just had a little chevy s10. but i didn’t want to give him a reason or justification of any type for any thing, so i proceeded at normal speed.  eventually he peeled off after riding along side me for about a half a mile and getting my tag number but all i could think was – here i am re-living my childhood – getting f-ed with by security guards.  anyways – the pics were worth the hassle.  i wonder if the cops will show up at my house any minute now to ask me about it?  who knows…

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